Punish airport bullies who can’t handle alcohol, not the rest of us

A second reason I think this idea is wrong is that all too often, airports are not fun. They are crowded, stressful, labyrinthine, bureaucratic, and full of screaming babies or passengers with 98 pieces of oversized luggage.

What do you need to relax from all this? Yes, a drink, maybe even four drinks, not two. And as for O’Leary’s complaint that drinking gets out of control when flights are delayed 10 hours, has he ever considered avoiding the flights being delayed 10 hours? Perhaps that would solve the problem better than his suggestion that we cancel our tickets if we drink a third pint of Staropramen.

A final reason why I think O’Leary’s suggestion is wrong is this: it simply won’t work. People will drink before they arrive, or they will smuggle vodka or gin into the departure lounge as water (how do you control that?), or they will resort to the “pills and powders” that he already says are a growing problem.

Or – and this might particularly sway the opinion of the ultra-capitalist Ryanair boss – airports that have no restrictions and don’t care about Ryanair will gain customers and grow, and airports that control their spritzers will lose customers and shrink, and at some point Ryanair might not make such big profits. Or go bust. I imagine O’Leary won’t be too happy about that.

No, the answer is boringly simple. Airports make a lot of money from alcohol, so they should spend some of it on strictly policing the behavior of the noisy minority. Throw a few drunken louts out of the airport to create a strong deterrent. But don’t spoil the fun for the many because of the sins of the few.